The 40th Year: Beginning

 I am a woman, a feminist who is a mom and a police officer, who loves working out and running...I have many roles each and every day. And each day I struggle like all moms to meet the demands of my job, my life, house, children and family. It has been the ultimate struggle.

This year I turned 40. Yeah. 4-0. And I had this list of all I wanted for my 40th year...lots of plans and exciting things: run a race every month including 2 half marathons, get a pixie cut(which I did), get a running tattoo(which I did: see above with a 13.1 on it too!)), maybe travel somewhere alone(without the husband and kids) and go back to college for my masters.

At the beginning of 2012, a wrench was thrown into all of that. One: my marriage began to unravel after 17 years. It's amazing how far apart 2 people can grow in 17 years of marriage. Raising 2 kids, busy jobs and overall forgetting who we each are as individuals and as a couple. Is this fixable? I don't know yet. It's being worked on, but there are no guarantees.

I then found out I have a stress fracture in my left lower leg and ongoing right hip pain...thus ruining my 12 races in 12 months plan...:(  The absolute stress reliever in my life: running, is not an option for some time. Waiting on the doctor for the actual prognosis.

My job: a deputy sheriff on road patrol. I love my job...so many reasons I became a police officer. The excitement, the desire to arrest the bad guys and put them in jail, the freedom of driving around the county, alone. And the ability as a police officer to make the right decisions whether it be on a domestic, a traffic stop or any routine call. I had hoped at this point in my career to be a detective. But so far, that has not happened. Sometimes it makes me wonder if I am going to be in that patrol car, with all  that gear on for the next 9 or more years and how that affects my body. I also work the night shift (6pm-6am), which is by choice. I like nights much better than days. This has been an issue on the homefront for 11 years. But the job itself: I love it. And wouldn't trade it for the world.

I hope to find my voice again here in this blog. It has been quiet for some time...I hope I can add some goodness to this world in this venue..

What I know right now as this year has continued down a very rough path is this: I will be beautiful, strong and brave.

Keep Running,
Amy